The youngest of the group, with a friend from school and his older cousin and friends. We left at a quarter past midnight. Our headlamps casting dancing shadows in the forest. The evergreens still draped in frost. The stillness of the night accentuating the beat of my heart, as the air gets thinner.
Stopping 2 hours from the summit everyone pulls out sleeping bags. Whoops. I never have been one for preparation. For the next 90 minutes I pace for warmth trying to invent an ipod in my mind. I didn't succeed, it would've been nice to have some music I figured.
As the sun pierces the horizon, the trek continues.
We reach the summit, without much event. A little chilly, a little tired. Not my most adventurous peak, not even the most exciting up Longs. But it was my first. The first time I felt like I was at the top of the world, looking out at all the other ants. And I found something so much better then my yet to be invented ipod.
This is the first time I vividly remember that wave of emotion, that slows everything down and can't be caught by words or time.
You don't have to necessarily climb a mountain for it, but that does seem to work.
It's that thing that makes you feel minuscule. The awe inspiring acknowledgement that there is a bigger presence out there.
It's a sunrise in the desert. It's a look. It's laughing from your gut. It's a real connection with another person.
It's catching a wave.
Realizing all you can do is ride the chaos if only for a moment.
It's the abstract moments in life that can't be contained in typical words. So we paint pictures, write poetry, dance in living rooms, hug, kiss, and even skip and jump on occasion.
It's a million nuclear explosions inside the sun to warm our skin on a brisk autumn day.
It's infinite different things that energize the universe around us. That are so easy to pass right by on our morning commute.
I suppose, it's probably something different for everyone. More and more maybe we're just missing the point. Maybe it's to mushy to acknowledge. or examine. or ponder over.
Maybe.
I live for these moments. Yet, I don't find them everyday, hidden in the details. Sometimes I lose them in a pile of wants and routine, stress and the feeling that any standing still is merely wasting time. All the things that destroy mental clarity.
I live for these moments. Yet, I don't find them everyday, hidden in the details. Sometimes I lose them in a pile of wants and routine, stress and the feeling that any standing still is merely wasting time. All the things that destroy mental clarity.
There is not always a mountain to climb. Take a deep breath, feel the oxygen invigorate from fingertips all the way into the wiggle of your toes. Feeling. It's kind of abstract. But sometimes, it's just feeling.
